© 2017 Space for the Soul with Chrissy

My Journey Home - Choosing to Move Forward

October 8, 2018

 

After I responded and went to bed, I just laid there like - What the FUCK was that. I had no idea that was heading my direction. I honestly did not expect him to respond. I just laid there talking to God and surrendering deeper into Love. I fell asleep.

 

Saturday morning, I woke with a letter in my head. I just started writing to Mario.

 

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Strangers is defined as a person some one does not know or with whom one is not familiar.

 

Yet, over the last 2 years, we have had a great deal of time to get to know each other. You and I have a different way of unfolding this awareness, but we have…

 

You trusted me instantly. You opened up and told me all about yourself, your family, your dreams, your deepest thoughts and feelings. You gave me everything in an instant.

 

I did not return that level of trust and openness to you, I did not know how, I had never been treated that way before. I was not raised in a family grounded in love.

 

I opened up to you in pieces, over time, I learned how to trust you, in the way you showed me instantly.

 

I do not agree that we are strangers, Mario. You are very familiar with me and I you. Although, I agree with you, there is a great deal to explore here between us. I think we owe it to ourselves to honor that. 

 

After meeting, you displayed your values through action. For example, your loyalty, love, and passion for things you hold sacred to you. Such as your family and the business - which is one in the same. Or, your genuine caring and authenticity for your neighbors. 

 

I hear you, you are not interested in exploring any deeper with me. 

 

Peace does not come to us by avoidance. We go deeper into peace by weeding out ego and choosing love. Allowing our heart to lead our head. 

 

I learned a great deal about this the last year working with Soldiers and helping them walk into deeper levels of peace. Making the impossible for the Army as a whole - possible.  I met an incredible amount of resistance from my military family and it hurt a great deal at times, but as you well know - I am persistent. I chose love and healed my upsets finding deeper levels of peace within me and my military family.

 

I've been doing this off duty - 15-18 hour days -  I've been working to heal my military family at night for over a year. It's all I've been focused on. 

 

That is what I desired to share with you, how choosing love made what seemed impossible for everyone turn into exactly what everyone truly desired. It brings me great joy to help large groups reach deeper levels of peace. To do that with my military family is a dream come true. 

 

You are absolutely right, It comes down to a choice. We can not choose for anyone but ourselves. I can only choose love for myself. As I choose love, I grow into deeper levels of peace. 

 

I know it took me awhile to understand, but I do. My deepest relationship is with God and Myself. That is the one and only relationship in my life. Everyone I encounter and interact with is a representation of my relationship with God because God runs through us all. Everyone is connected Mario, everyone. 

 

The only way to dance with God is allowing God to lead.

 

I honor your choices and life experiences. I would not do anything to hurt you or those you love. 

 

I will honor your space and stop mailing you.

 

----- This felt complete ---

 

I spent the rest of Saturday and most of Sunday in Upheaval. Well earned Upheaval.

 

This was my pattern but it is also part of my process. Sunday, I watched my Wednesday TFAS Class again.

 

There was energy coming up that it was not done. I honored the feelings and went deeper with God. I am not in control here... I chose to surrender and follow my guidance.

 

I started healing and loving myself as a great deal of sadness entered my system. I spent some time outside and talked to my friend Cristina.

 

--- I went to bed feeling at peace and was right back up - I was feeling words taking form but on what? I was resisting it as I desired to be done - I surrendered and just let it flow.

 

There was something in his correspondence to address more deeply. As I went through every word....

 

It then hit me.... Respect

 

Next Chapter

 

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Please reference the Glossary for terms and resources. 

 

*If you are inspired and choose to deepen your relationship with Love by joining TFAS or Life Purpose Class - I invite you to refer me, Chrissy Kay, at time of purchase. You will receive 4 weeks of FREE coaching in my live group coaching class. Check it out here. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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